Category: mental health

mental health

30 Day Mental Health Challenge

mistibludream

Check off each day as you go. If you miss a day, go back to it and complete at the end.

Feel free to share any of your challenges and activities on Instagram with #30DayBlu

  • Day 1: Write a list of your goals for the month
  • Day 2: Put your headphones on and go on a 15 minute walk.
  • Day 3: Treat yourself! Whether it is a concert, hot bath, massage or ice cream… you deserve it.
  • Day 4: Write a letter to someone who hurt you and then burn it.
  • Day 5: No phone for the evening! Shut off your phone before dinner and don’t touch it till morning.
  • Day 6: Start a new book or continue reading the book that you haven’t finished yet.
  • Day 7: Compliment 3 complete strangers
  • Day 8: Plan a mini adventure for your next day off. Check out a nearby town. Go to a museum or garden, for example.
  • Day 9: Reach out to a person you have been out of touch with; ask them how they’ve been.
  • Day 10: Clean your closet and donate what you don’t use or wear anymore
  • Day 11: Try something new! Go to a yoga class or an art class.
  • Day 12: Look in the mirror and tell yourself 3 great things about yourself
  • Day 13: Cut something toxic out of your life. Examples: a bad habit, toxic relationship, sugar addiction.
  • Day 14: Health day! Smoothies, salads and clean eating. Focus on health and nutrition today.
  • Day 15: Spend 15 minutes stretching and focusing on breathing.
  • Day 16: Do something nice and unexpected for someone.
  • Day 17: Be present. Make eye contact all day, with each conversation you have. Even if it is the cashier at the grocery store. Be aware of your surroundings and listen.
  • Day 16: Get a jar and fill it with all the loose change you find throughout the day. Label it with your choice: vacation, anniversary, Christmas funds, new shoes, massage…
  • Day 17: No social media till noon! Check on your list of goals for the month or catch up on a day you missed.
  • Day 18: Learn something new. Spend 15 minutes reading or researching about an interesting topic.
  • Day 19: Art day! Create something: a drawing, poem, painting, or anything of your choice. Check Pinterest if you are drawing a blank.
  • Day 20: Think of something you have done that you regret or are ashamed of. Forgive yourself. You are human and we make mistakes and grow from them. Think about what you learned. Follow with a self-care activity.
  • Day 21: Send a card or letter to a good friend or family member.
  • Day 22: Clean your nightstand, wash your bedding and plan to go to bed early tonight. No tv or phone! Focus on breathing and visualize the ocean or mountains.
  • Day 23: Forgive someone who never apologized. Think about how you were hurt and let it go. You owe it to yourself, not them.
  • Day 24: Donate some items to the Humane Society, local food pantry or women’s shelter.
  • Day 25: Do something outside of your comfort zone.
  • Day 26: Make that doctors appointment you have been putting off… your annual check up, routine bloodwork or that follow up and never went to.
  • Day 27: Check on your strong friends. Ask them how they are doing, reach out and give them an opportunity to open up. Those who appear put together sometimes have silent battles.
  • Day 28: Clean your vehicle. If you don’t have a vehicle then clean your bathroom or office.
  • Day 29: Photo day! Take photos of throughout the day to show your perspective through your eyes, but in black and white. Get creative.
  • Day 30: Pay it forward
mental health

Are Antipsychotic Medications Safe?

mistibludream

I am a firm believer that everyone should have genetic testing done. Genetic testing will show which medication you do or do not metabolize as well as which medications you may have an abnormal reaction to. This includes blood thinners, seizure medications, pain medications and psychiatric medications.

Pharmocogentics testing for CYP450, CYP2D6, CYP2D19 genotypes will show personalized information on metabolism for antidepressants and antipsychotics. The MTHFR gene mutation is common in up to 40% of the population and can also alter the response to medications and actually can be the culprit of mental illness alone. The CACNA1C gene is responsible for flow of calcium into neurons and is linked to 5 mental health disorders.

Doctors treat mental illness like a one-size-fits-all standard diagnosis and treatment. Mental illness can be a result of many factors, such as a biochemical imbalance (vitamin deficiencies) rather than simply requiring SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor) or blocking certain receptors. You have to ask yourself, “why does this medication’s adverse reactions include reactions that you are trying to treat?”

Some of these medications can increase the risk of getting diabetes, lower sex drive due to hormonal changes, cardiovascular disorders, involuntary muscle movements, seizures and even a drop in white blood cells.

FDA approval of an antipsychotic medication does not mean it is effective. The FDA only sees one or two of the best studies shown for short-term effectiveness. After 1987, doctors were shocked to have to admit that SSRIs could cause fatal reactions and induce psychosis, mania and depression (Gantt 2018). In fact, none of these drugs are allowed to claim that they may prevent suicide.

In Taking Sides: Psychological Issues, it states that at least 90% of the infamous homicidal school shooters were already under the care of a psychiatrist (or psych drug prescriber) and were either taking or withdrawing from one or more psychiatric drug. The other 10% are simply unknown due to their medical files being secured by authorities.

It is safe to say that these medications can do harm and may not be safe for everyone.

References:

Gantt, E. E., & Slife, B. (2018). Taking sides: Clashing views on psychological issues, 20th edition. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill Education.

http://www.mensahmedical.com/what-are-biochemical-imbalances/

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0033318206700299

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-integrationist/201409/genetic-mutation-can-affect-mental-physical-health

Health, mental health, Unveiling Invisible Illnesses

Rare Disease Day

mistibludream

It is Rare Disease Day so obviously I am jumping on this moment to raise awareness. I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome and a rare type, called cardiac-valvular EDS or cvEDS.

Hypermobility is very common with EDS. There are many, many other health issues that fall under the umbrella due to this collagen defect. Imagine your joints are like rubber, frequently popping out of place from even just a hug or rolling over in bed. Sometimes these joints stay out of place or wear down. It is a painful disease to many.

This does not only affect joints but can also affect your organs.

We are all different and we call ourselves Zebras because in the medical field, doctors and nurses are trained that when they hear hooves to look for horses not zebras. This mentality has caused me to go undiagnosed and medically neglected for my entire life, up until I had genetic testing last year. Despite my heart issues and frequent ER visits, being young and seemingly healthy has had me labeled as drug seeking or having anxiety attacks.

The reason why is because EDS and dysautonomia (dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system) does not show up on routine blood work. I have never done drugs, besides cannabis, and even after open heart surgery and a broken sternum I did not even finish my pain meds prescription. I have been treated as if I were an IV drug user, because in my area that is the only reason someone of my age would have this extent of damage to their heart. I am so incredibly thankful to now be taken seriously with a diagnosis, but it is bittersweet because this syndrome is progressive and for me, my heart is always at risk. In my recent echo, I have developed a dilated aortic root. This is beyond scary to me because EDS, especially cvEDS comes with aneurisms. Dealing with this type of diagnosis as well as chronic pain and illness is mentally exhausting.

I am passionate about awareness is because it took so fucking long to be heard. I suffered for so long not taking proper care of myself and not knowing the correct treatments. I have been called a hypochondriac by exes and have hidden behind a mask for years. I want others to know they are not alone and I want medical professionals to see us.

Health, mental health

How Can Anyone Heal With Toxic Positivity?

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We are programmed to praise positivity and joy while shunning grief and sadness, which isolates those who need help. As children grow after years of being told to behave and smile, they become adults wearing masks. Our bodies suppress anger, pain, sorrow, suffering and negative emotions that we are not allowed to acknowledge. These buried feelings grow with no release as we walk rampant, showing our teeth to the world to presume only happiness exists within us.

Relationships deepen through vulnerability. People need to open up about their fears, not tuck them away to pretend life is perfect. The world sees strength defined as being tough and resistant to anything other than joy. Sensitivity is seen as weakness.

People need to open up about their sorrows, not hide them with a smile that says “I’m fine.” People need to discuss their anger, not bottle it up. People will explode. People will crumble.

How can anyone heal in an environment that doesn’t allow basic human emotion to breathe?

We are all responsible and need to change our way of thinking so that we can make others feel safe to talk and reach out.

Our culture is designed to suppress half of our basic human emotions, leaving us depressed actors.

It is time to face the reality that life is not perfect and human emotions are not linear. Life is hard and pretending that we are all okay is dangerously exhausting.

Stop telling people to suck it up or that they will be fine. Ask how you can help, listen, and pay attention to the subtle details. Check on your strong friends, your happy friends, and your quiet friends.

Take off your masks and let others know it’s okay to not be okay. It is okay to cry, to grieve, to be angry, to feel lost and to feel frustrated.

We are not robots.

We can’t heal by dreaming of rainbows to swallow our pain and trauma. We heal through a process. We prevent crumbling by expressing emotions. We cannot continue to build a stigma that negative emotions equal weakness. It is time to change the rules.

Health, mental health, Unveiling Invisible Illnesses

Waking Up in Pain

mistibludream

Mornings are hard. When you think of Sundays, you think of sleeping in and waking up to the sun finding it’s way to to you. You think of sitting up, a nice stretch and a moment to admire the open window sharing hints of a beautiful day.

The reality is that you wake up from pain. And you have woken up several times already but you hurt too much to go back to sleep and the sun is up now, so you may as well get out of bed. Lying in bed hurts. It isn’t this relaxing thing where you can leisurely sprawl out in bed and feel like you are on a cloud, melting into your mattress. No, you have to move because one position makes your tailbone go numb and another hurts your collarbone and lying on your stomach makes your back feel broken.

So, now you get up and everything pops back into place. Almost everything. Your left hand and lips are tingling and numb but it only last a few minutes. You walk to the bathroom, holding on to everything you pass for stability so that you don’t fall. Even when you sit down, reaching to wipe is excruciating and demoralizing. It breaks you just glimpsing into the future, wondering if are going to need help wiping your own ass one day. Then, as much as you want to crawl back into bed and melt into your significant other, you quietly walk out of the room so you can find something to do and walk off the pain of sleeping.

Your head is killing you and you are nauseous as if you are hungover. As you walk to the kitchen, everything fades away and you can’t see. Your body starts to feel fuzzy and go numb, just like before you pass out. You don’t typically fully pass out so you know you can just keep walking through it as long as you hold on the way there. You are a pro and have smiled and held conversations while on the brink of passing out but you know it passes and this is your norm.

When pain levels are high, your morale is low. Your dreams and ambition slide over to the back burner. Sometimes they even get put away into Tupperware to decay in the back, hidden behind the fruit. Sometimes the sunshine creeping in through the window looks so far away. But you just get through this. You hold on to the idea of your next good day, whenever that may be. You find hope in new remedies and whatever ways you can try to have control over your health. You find hope in the people who support you and your loved ones.

“Mornings are hard. When you think of Sundays, you think of sleeping in and waking up to the sun finding it’s way to to you. You think of sitting up, a nice stretch and a moment to admire the open window sharing hints of a beautiful day.”

*On the pain scale of 1-10, I have never been under a five. My one is a five. I am not wanting sympathy but what I am wanting is to be honest about how I feel instead of hiding with an autopilot response of “I’m fine.” I want to raise awareness for people like me so they don’t feel alone, and for people without chronic pain so that they can understand their loved one or friend. We live in a world of sucking it up and smiling through the pain. We are suppressed and depressed with a bottled soul. It isn’t right. Be real and let others be real so they they aren’t lost and alone.

mental health

Toxic Positivity

mistibludream

Toxic positivity is a thing. We are raised to suck it up and smile. Well, fuck that. I want my friends and family to be real. I want to know about your shitty day. We all have those days. I want genuine. Raw. I don’t want you to fake anything for me or anyone else. Let people feel safe! Break the stigma of bottling shit up and autopilot responses like “I’m fine, and you?” Mental health is an epidemic because we all participate in hiding, making everyone feel alone. It’s time for change.

mental health, Unveiling Invisible Illnesses

Are You Still In There?

mistibludream

When bad days turn into weeks. When your strengths are suffocating. When your dreams drift too far. When nothing seems fair. When tears turn into fears. When you get lost. When you feel defeated. When you stop feeling. You aren’t alone.

mental health

Spring Home Makeover 

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*Published in The Beachside Resident February 2019 issue

Throughout our lives, we receive gifts and collect items. Whether it is from a vacation, retail therapy, your birthday or hand-me-downs, we accumulate a lot of stuff! It piles up and consumes our living space each day. Think about your junk drawer or the to-do list pile on your desk, the back of your closet or even your pantry. There is so much that we do not utilize and yet we still continue to shop for useless items. 
Chances are, 80% of your junk draw is trash or has another place it belongs. If you haven’t been maintaining your clean home groove, your living space may start to feel a little disorderly. A cluttered or chaotic space can cause anxiety. Getting your stuff in order gives you a pleasant feng shui, which is like a positive energy flow. 
Most of us have a busy life juggling kids, school, a relationship, friends, work or whatever other million things you have on your plate. The last thing you want to do is add cleaning your entire home to the list. Don’t. Do not overwhelm yourself. There is no need to turn your house upside down, lose sleep or forget to shave your left leg because your brain has turned into jello. Relax and watch some Netflix. 
The plan is to find small projects weekly, monthly, or whatever routine you can handle. I personally love to do these projects on Sundays. I let the sun shine through the windows, play Alabama Shakes on my speakers, light some incense and get to work. I make the process feel therapeutic. I always have a little box tucked away to fill up; my goal is to fill it throughout the month and donate it. I also have the “out of sight, out of mind” mentality of old belongings. Unless they are sentimental or something of use, throw it away or put it in the donate pile. Now, the “does this bring you joy?” question for each item is not always relevant. My hammer doesn’t bring me joy (that would probably be a red flag) but I need it. However, the ugly snowman candy dish from 2011 can probably find a new home. 
Organizing your items in a way that they can all be seen is brilliant. Marie Kondo’s method uses shoeboxes as dividers and folds shirts in a way that you can view them all instead of digging around and unfolding everything by accident, to find what you need. Personally, I love using baskets to add another shelf to a surface, such as a desk or end table. You can stack them for more storage space and they are lightweight, inexpensive and easy to change up. 
While you are decluttering, you can simmer hot water on the stove with orange peels, cinnamon sticks and cloves as a natural way to make your home smell amazing. Now you have learned how to be productive without getting overwhelmed! What home project are you going to do first while you get your dance on?
Health, mental health

Battling Holiday Blues

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Battling Holiday Blues
It’s that time of year again when everyone is filled with cheer and joy. Evenings are filled with holiday music, spiked eggnog and colorful lights glimmer throughout the streets and sparkling on homes. But the truth is, not everyone is filled with joy this time of year. For some, they may be missing a loved one or they are financially burdened. Many people live paycheck to paycheck and having to spend an entire month’s income on gifts that add up to the same price of your bills, is beyond stressful. Here are a few ways to lighten the load and help you win this year’s holiday battle of the blues:
  • Support Small Businesses
Amazon is so convenient and don’t we all love it? However, consider doing a portion of your shopping with local vendors or small businesses. Supporting a mom and pop shop can help that family to afford putting their child in dance class or braces on their son. You are supporting someone’s dream. You are also buying unique and thoughtful gifts. Small businesses don’t carry genetic watered down products. Their goods are full of love and dreams. There is more of a creative and personal feel to shopping small or local. Plus, you are supporting your community. 
  • Create Memories or Homemade Goods
  • If you are on a budget but still want to give gifts this year, surely you can afford memories or make something. You can prevent your bank account from causing you financial grief, which can allow you to relax and enjoy the season a little more. For example, gift your parents a homemade dinner and game night that you host. They can choose the date and come over and be spoiled. Or, gift your significant other a coupon book for massages, dinner, cleaning and some x-rated fun. Gift your friend or sister a night of babysitting. These are all thoughtful, free and memorable. Another option is making homemade gifts like candles, scrubs, art or even baked goods. 
  • Self Care 
  • During times of stress, we forget to take care of ourselves. Maybe skip a night out and listen to music or read a book instead. Decompress with a bath and wine. Hell, a bath in wine! Call old friends or family and catch up on the phone while you pamper yourself. Treat yourself to a massage. Mental health is just as important as physical health. Drinking plenty of fluids and making sure your nutrition is not suffering, is also important. Vitamin D and folate deficiencies can cause depression and anxiety. Pro tip: folic acid is a synthetic version of folate that many of us can not process; avoid it and take a bioactive or methylated version of folate. Just like the saying, “you can’t pour from an empty cup,” you have to take care of yourself. Herbal teas are a good way to maintain your stress levels. Kava, valerian root, lemon balm, and ashwagandha root are great relaxing teas. CBD oil is a natural option for managing stress, anxiety, and difficulty sleeping.
  • Volunteer 
  • If you still feel like you are in a funk, volunteering is an excellent way to bring you back to reality. Sometimes helping others in unfortunate situations can help change our perspective, humble us or make us more grateful. You can volunteer at a shelter and serve food to those in need or donate your time to a local organization. My favorite is the Humane Society. Walking dogs and petting cats is therapeutic and the animals are so grateful. It gives you a sense of purpose. 
  • Get a Hobby
  • I’ll admit that life can get stagnant sometimes, even if everything is great. Shake things up and challenge yourself to do something new like yoga, painting, jogging, martial arts, baking, blogging, flying paper airplanes… anything! Hobbies are outlets and we all need to do something other than work, poop, shower, eat, repeat. Find your passion and spark in life. Save up for a road trip. Plan fun adventures. Even if it is by yourself. You don’t need a copilot. Sometimes it is great to just let your mind wander and enjoy the journey. Waiting to live and have fun until you find someone to do these things with is a sad excuse that is holding you back. Learn to love yourself and your company. Make new friends and be open to possibilities. 
  • Don’t Be Afraid To Get Help
  • There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeing a therapist. Honestly, everyone should see a therapist. We live in a time where we are trained to smile and be positive. We are human. We feel things! It is okay to feel. Sometimes our friends are not always the best person to vent to. A professional can help you find the tools to cope and manage stress. It is literally their job and they aren’t waiting for their turn to speak. The suicide prevention lifeline number is 1-800-273-8255. You never know what is around the corner, no matter how dark this chapter seems. Your next chapter could be the best times of your life. Giving up hope robs you of that and spreads your pain to those who love you. 
Health, mental health

What Are You Thankful For?

mistibludream

Throughout my life, I have struggled with depression. Actually, I am lying. I am underplaying it; I have struggled deeply my entire life with depression. I never felt like I was enough. I never felt worthy. I was born with serious health issues and minimal care due to negligent doctors and lack of insurance. I chose the wrong people to enter relationships with because I had no self worth so my standards were nonexistent. I sabotaged relationships as well because I felt like I was doing them a favor. I let friends take advantage of me because I was happy just to have friends. Twice, I had to get expired food out of a pantry and I mastered making meals out of what was left in the cupboard. I cursed the universe because life was not fair. I have bottled childhood trauma up and carried it with me throughout my life.

I am grateful that one day I decided to wake up and appreciate what was good in my life instead of numbing my pain and feeling like a failure. I cut out toxic people in my life and raised my standards on what I expected out of a relationship. I stopped letting negativity consume me and tried being positive for once. I took my health into my own hands and advocated for myself and educated myself. I stopped eating like shit and corrected imbalances and deficiencies and taking care of myself and my body. (Also, huge props to correcting my MTHFR mutation which really was a significant part of depression for me).

I am now in the most loving, abundant and stable relationship I have ever been in and my heart is full of love and happiness. I don’t feel worthless and I know I am a good mother and if anyone tries to change how I feel about myself, they will fail miserably. I am strong, determined and passionate. I am thankful that I never gave up. I almost did, many times. I am grateful that I pulled myself out of the dark and loved myself. I never would have known this beautiful life I have now. I don’t know who needed to read this but I felt a strong urge to share this. Never give up! You never know what is around the corner for you. You are worth the love you give everyone else and everything is going to be okay.